Two Geordies, Four Eyes and Lots of Tears in Today’s News
Thursday, May 26th, 2011
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AMERICAN DREAM IS OVER FOR W’OOR CHERYL (Adrian)
A few short months ago it was announced with much fanfare that the nation’s sweetheart Cheryl Cole was set to take up the judge’s position on the new American version of the X-Factor. Fans wept as the Geordie warbler packed up from Blighty and clung firmly onto the coattails of Simon Cowell as they headed towards the land of the free in search of her American dream. But it seems the great adventure is now over, after the Girls Aloud singer was dropped from her position as a judge on the show. Whether because her thick Geordie accent was too difficult to understand – or because her boring personality and meagre talent were rightly questioned by audiences – we’ll never know. Some even say that the two-month experience in the U.S. had made her “homesick”, which seems a little wussy for someone that’s spent the past decade touring the world in a girl band. Whatever the case, we’ll probably see her back on the next series of UK X-Factor. What joy…
HOW TO TIE YOUR SHOELACES (Scott)
You know how to tie your shoelaces, right? I mean, you’ve probably been doing it since you started school. Well, here’s a newsflash – chances are you’re doing it wrong. I’ve yet to see a bad TED Talk. This one, just a few minutes long, is typical of how these events bring forward brilliant, creative and interesting people to challenge conventional thinking.
EYE, EYE – HERE’S LOOKING AT YOU! (Raymond)
I suppose only Simon Cowell could spark a frenzied debate about glasses v contacts when he appeared on TV for only the second time wearing his Gregory Peck’s. Simon dropped his standard contacts to go on camera at an Oprah Winfrey tribute with his Harry Potter-style prescription glasses. Of course, as only the Cowell-meister could, the Twittersphere is in a frenzy over whether he should stick to the specs or keep in contact with his contacts.
The pictures are here for you to decide.
ASTRONAUT’S VIEW OF GALAXY IS A SIGHT FOR SORE EYES (Pamela)
An astronaut’s space walk got cut short after getting soap in his eye while fitting power cables on the surface of the International Space Station. The spaceman said that it “stung like crazy,” but was pleased to report that the sensation only lasted a few minutes. On completing the voyage, which lasted a further seven hours after the soap incident, NASA‘s lead space walk officer confirmed that the irritant was an anti fogging solution that had been used on the inside of the astronaut’s helmet, which is apparently very similar to washing up liquid. Interestingly, the space walker noted that when your eyes tear up in space, the tears don’t drop off, they just stay there……..cue panic attack.
ANGER IN NEWCASTLE AS LOCALS SLAM FIRST EPISODE OF GEORDIE SHORE (Linsay)
It just goes to show that not all reality shows are proving popular- unlike The only way is Essex who won a BAFTA of all things. More than 23,000 people have signed up to a Facebook page stating ‘R.I.P Geordie Shore’ and The Sun has reported that a petition has been sent to MTV with over 4,000 signatures to axe the show. I believe this is all good for ratings as it pulled in over 330,000 viewers- who knows, this could be the next BAFTA winner of 2012!!