Some Monster Stories To Get Your Day Off To A Roaring Start

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Did you have a chuckle at some of that hilarious advertising jargon? Or perhaps you will be queuing up for the new version of Monopoly? Let us know on our Twitter or Facebook pages.

WANKY AD SLOGANS (Victoria)

It sure is enjoyable to poke fun at our friends in advertising land! Which is why I took particular pleasure in exploring a Tumblr account called simply, ‘Agency Wank.’
This basically collates some of the most absurd and delusional advertising copy found on agency websites around the world, featuring such gems as, ‘we spent more money on our annual Christmas party last year than we did on award-show entries’ and ‘it’s not about buzzwords. It’s about your mom.’
I know we get it hard for our terminology sometimes, but WOW.
http://agencywank.tumblr.com/

POUNDLAND MONOPOLY (Sarah)

I have never been a huge fan of Monopoly, probably because my younger sister always wins and has done ever since she was given kids Monopoly one Christmas. However, listening to the radio this morning I heard about the ‘new’ Monopoly board by Hasbro that was unveiled in yesterday’s Huffington Post online. Hasbro has updated the UK version in order to ‘more accurately reflect the average British high street’. Instead of upmarket stores and establishments this new version features Poundland and empty HMV stores, to name but a few. Not only this but the ‘chance’ cards are a hoot. My favourite is probably being: ‘drunk in charge’. Get featured on the cover of Heat magazine. Collect £200. If this board isn’t yet in production its popularity will no doubt ensure it is soon!
http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2013/01/22/new-uk-monopoly-board-spoof_n_2519704.html​

MARTIAL ARTS POSES, SHOPPING TROLLIES & COWBOY HATS (Aoibhínn)

A spoof RTÉ news report has been doing the rounds lately, unfortunately for us poor Irish the rest of the world seems to be under the impression it’s legit – I don’t know what sort of reputation we’ve managed to accrue for ourselves.  The clip is in fact from Irish Pictorial Weekly, a new satirical sketch show which looks at the country’s political and media culture using a range of sketch formats and media manipulation. The clip features an RTÉ presenter reporting an encounter between an off-duty Irish policeman ‘culchie’ in Dublin to watch a Gaelic football match, the all Ireland Final none the less, and a Dublin guy who assaults him. I’ll not even attempt to explain its hilarity – just watch it! And for all you non-Irish, a ‘culchie’ is a person from the country, or anyone really from outside Dublin.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VDrNZSJolow&feature=youtu.be​

GRABBING YOUR ATTENTION: HEADLINE AND STINKER (Catrina)

The headline of a story is extremely important, it needs to be eye-catching enough to grab our attention and make us want to read the story.  A headline can make or break our interest, but I have to say my personal favourite type of headline is the ones that go with stories that you can’t quite believe actually happened.  The Huffington Post has listed 10 of the most ridiculous headlines for our amusement and some of them will have you searching on Google for the article:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/newsreaders/10-of-the-most-ridiculous-news-headlines-8npp

GAMBLING WITH DEATH (Aimee)

When you think of gambling you might conjure images of the bestuscasinos.org real money guide or a nervous energy ridden Ladbrokes or casino hall. Dangerous games for your wallet but not at the expense of someone’s life – unless you’re in Taiwan. Apparently a gambling trend has appeared in Taichung’s Eastern District where over a hundred businesses under the guise of ‘elderly associations’ are actually haunts for gambling on the probability of a terminally ill patient dying within a specific period of time. Sounds like it could be something out of a sick comedy sketch with gamblers excitedly praying their subject clocks off within one to six months when the payout rates are at their peak. After six months the payout takes a whacking and after a year, you can kiss goodbye to any wad of cash – so while family members are celebrating their loved one fighting for slightly longer in their doomed demise, gamblers just want you on a morgue slab.
http://www.weirdasianews.com/2013/01/23/punters-doctors-win-big-family-members-die-shameful-sham/